The Sin of Certainty

Savage / Zen Newsletter No. 101

“They are alive and well somewhere,
The smallest sprout shows there is really no death,
And if ever there was it led forward life, and does not wait at the end to arrest it,
And ceas’d the moment life appear’d.
All goes onward and outward, nothing collapses,
And to die is different from what anyone supposed, and luckier.”
– Walt Whitman, Song of Myself

Bukowski said to “beware the knowers.” I had a thought the other day, that the more someone preens about “what is optimal” the less I trust their judgment.

Not only have we failed to outgrow, but the divisiveness and dividedness of the “COVID era” has continued to fester. Every year I clinch my fist at another once-beloved well meaning doctor, influencer, or inspirational figure who’s sold out to the algorithmic gods.

Their identity has become one of mongering fear, selling outrage, and seasoning it with a sprinkle of truth so that they can pallet their dogma in an echo chamber. I don’t have the time or desire to call them all out or to correct them based on their own previous stances and forlorn acknowledgements of nuance.

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It’s all too easy to forget that the most dangerous biases are the ones that confirm our beliefs and affirm our present actions. Many people have an extremely difficult time seeing beyond what is currently working for them.

My clinical work has lead me to believe that certainty is a veil for insecurity. Outside of textbooks, in the wilds of the real world, it’s not always easy to distinguish between those “divinely inspired”, the delusional, and the psychotic.

On the flip side, cynics will forever coddle their thorny safety blanket. If everyone sucks and the world is just a terrible place, then I get to be right… and stay miserable. At least the delusional are happy until the levy breaks.

I still gag at the phrase “trust the science” … which is ironically a very un-scientific thing to say. Isn’t science in the business of verifying more than trusting? Politics and medicine aside, this is true in fitness and sport as well.

I feel similarly nauseous whenever a new “study” is published and spun around social media declaring what is “optimal” based on “consensus” and association. Rest assured the evidence-based bros and ecological pundits are playing the same popularity game.

Furthermore, we haven’t even got to verifying whether or not said studies are valid or accurate. For who? Under what conditions? At what cost?

“God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatest of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?”
– Fredrich Nietzsche

The above is one of the most misunderstood and most paraphrased quotes from Nietzsche. He’s not advocating for atheism, he’s lamenting the zealotry of The State, or “science” – which unfortunately seems to have become synonymous in recent decades.

In a sense then, science has killed creativity. It’s “settled” right?

If your weekend rabbit hole on PubMed and YouTube or clever prompts to AI are superior to coaches and athletes who’ve spent decades doing the things you only write, read, or dream about – why haven’t we all become superhuman demigods yet?

Maybe we need to go back to raw-dogging our workouts. No FitBits. No iPhones. No chest straps or smart watches. For damn sure, no TVs. I’m tempted to even cross off the stereo so you have to hear the (unpleasant) voices in your head – but I’ll allow analog speakers.

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No TikTok binge of inspirational clips and motivational quotes are going to do the changing for you, no matter how wise or true they may be. You’re going to have to cultivate that magical sauce called happiness on your own because confidence is born from experience, not knowledge.

If you find yourself short on that, I guess you’re going to have to talk to someone that’s doing better than you. Yup, actually talk to another human being. Even more daunting, you’re going to have to be nice about it since you’ve got something to gain from the encounter.

Does that make you anxious? Good. No change worth talking about has ever come from outsourcing your goals to magazines that have been selling the same headlines for 50 years.

“Faith is not a belief. Faith is what is left when your beliefs have all been blown to hell. Faith is in the heart, while beliefs are in the head. Experiences, even spiritual experiences, come and go. As long as you base your faith on experience, your faith is going to be constantly flickering, because your experiences keep changing.”
― Ram Dass, Be Love Now: The Path of the Heart

A reasonable antidote to boredom is creativity. Anxiety? Doing. Depression? Connection. All of these things have tragically been cheapened in the modern world. Sport and martial “arts” are no exception. Fitness lost credibility when anti-doping agencies tried to convince us they ensured no “enhanced” athletes would prevail.

Somewhere in the middle east there’s a man wearing what looks like a dress, power cleaning 400 lb. stones. He doesn’t give a damn about the latest and greatest rep-set scheme of leg extensions for hypertrophy, or if “vegetables are trying to kill him.”

Likewise, somewhere in Moab there’s a mange-haired climber subsisting on American Spirit cigarettes, Diet Coke, and Skittles who would thrash every Olympic contender. But s/he could probably come up with a decent hangboard protocol on the spot if offered an IPA or two.

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Celebrate Differently

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I’m not saying that I endorse all of the aforementioned behaviors, I’m saying that baggy linen pants and burning palo santo won’t magically turn you into a spiritual guru and a dozen more “new study finds…” posts on Instagram won’t help your PRs. They will, however, reinforce your dependence on “objective” and curated “truths.”

This comes at the expense of your own resilience and independence. That is why creativity matters. To become yourself, you’ll have to embrace uncertainty. You don’t have to be foolish, but your best should scare you a bit. It’s never been done before.

No one has ever been you before, so why do you so readily accept the limitations of others?

If you think the cost of success is too great, wait until you get the bill for regret. Real legends aren’t being studied in university laboratories, they’re busy doing epic shit. You won’t find that disclosure in any peer-reviewed journal or trendy biohacking blog.

A lot of people like to use the expression “fuck around and find out (FAFO)”, but maybe we should do a little more “fuck off and figure it out.” Find something you love. Go hard at it. Don’t ask questions, not right away anyway.

Uncertainty is an opportunity.

What are you going to do with it?

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